Modern Family Dilemma

Modern Setting

Breadwinning

Every Morning

Dad and Mom leave the house and go out on a breadwinning mission.

End Month

Dad and Mom bring home their pay checks. Pen and paper in hand, its budgeting time. Bills, investments etc. are the agendas.

On the first day of the month they both hit the road again and the cycle continues.

Housework

Don’t even go there. It’s a tug of war.

Dad says, “Babe where is my food. Please iron my shirt. Feed the baby. And blah blah blah ….”

Mom goes like, “Dude are you for real, do I look like a super machine that works on a 24 hr basis while you do 12?”

Dad either walks out of the door enraged and goes out to look for consolation elsewhere or retorts bitterly, “you’re my wife and housework is your duty, didn’t your mama train you? Go get my food and stop complaining.”

Mom is now weeping and mutters amid sobs, “but honey we’re both doing the breadwinning don’t you think we should share the housework too.”

Dad sinks deeper into the coach, feet on the table, raises the volume on the TV set and buries his head in the newspaper.

Mom drags her feet to the kitchen and grudgingly does the necessary.

Outcome

Either the home becomes a permanent war zone or fatigue wears mama out. And she becomes a top client at the clinic. Or worse still, a lawyer banks yet another fat check, out of a successful divorce case.

Traditional Setting

Breadwinning

Every Morning

Dad goes out on a breadwinning mission.

End Month

Dad brings home the pay check and calls out mama, “dear, bring me your budget.” Dad incorporates mama’s budget into his, does some adjustments here and there, reaches for his wallet and hands mama some cash. She walks away satisfied.

Dad takes care of the other bills and investments. And life goes on.

Housework

Mom’s territory. She’s well versed with the ins and outs of this arena. Everything is in its place at the right time.

Unfortunately, mama is a financial cripple and this blows dad’s ego out of proportion. Mom puts on her war gear, *submission* and she sure wins the battle.

As dad’s ego increases, mama begins to feel the pressure. She lays low to the point where she can barely 'breath'.

Outcome

A sitting at Beijing is convened.

Observation and Recommendation

There is a dire need to rectify what needs rectifying and adjust where necessary to guarantee healthy modern families. It’s time for the society to rise up and face reality instead of relying on redundant systems, which thrive in UNFAIRNESS and UNNECESSARY POWER BATTLES.

However, whichever setting you find yourself in, let FAIRNESS be your guiding principle.

And for better or worse, strive to keep it together.